Travel – Page 3 – The Procrastination Pen

Sleeping With ASMR

Recently I have been including a cameo role for a professional ASMR artist. I’ve limited my adventurings to videos where they are playing a medical professional to fit in with the ongoing blog theme, which has focused on medical-themed ASMR videos for well over a year now.

Once a person strays into this area though, you very quickly realise that there are a huge number of medical-themed ASMR videos and the scope for spending hours on really quite unsuitable videos is commensurately high.

After trying a few, I also happened upon another hazard which is that the first several minutes of the video is given over to the junk the sponsor of the video wants to sell. Quite a lot of heinous-instantly-disposables in such videos. It convinces me that any video organised this way is unlikely to get much space on this blog. There is quite enough intrusive time given over to advertising as it is, without it forming a part of the video itself.

This one seems to escape some of these problems:

ASMR Head to Toe Assessment 2024 [Full Body Medical Examination] | ‘Unintentional Style’ Roleplay

Sadly, there is the ever-present air conditioning noise which I would think a professional ASMR artist could ensure was dispensed with. There are also some equipment noises, including some loudish beeps, whirring equipment and clunks from moving equipment around. This is rather like many of the genuine medical videos we have reviewed. There is the sound of rubber gloves which is quite off-putting. The video is a little over forty minutes so quite substantial and as expected the tone of the presentation is nigh on perfect. In this case two recognised ASMR artists are collaborating so in a sense it is two for one in that both voices here are excellent (if they weren’t then the number of subscribers would be something of a surprise).

The channel is Ivy B ASMR it has 350K subscribers and 1.9K videos so someone deeply loves this ASMR artist (or rather quite a number of someones).

So, well worthy of consideration, I think. I will place it into the sweetie jar list. However, bear in mind this list does not receive anything like the attention of the main Procrastination Pen playlist as it has not been the focus of this blog (at least so far).

So, after that brief sojourn into videos created deliberately for ASMR, back to the inadvertent ASMR video and, perhaps the slightly more difficult task of finding a video with potentially relaxing effects amongst the large number of videos which are unsuitable.

Today, we return to Stanford, which has been a rich well of restful videos.

Venous Testing

This is just a little over five minutes in length, so blink and it is already gone. It is a professional video and so, as we would expect, there are notes. “4 Jul 2012

Visit: stanfordmedicine25.stanford.edu

This video is from the Stanford Medicine 25: an initiative to enhance the culture of bedside medicine and physical diagnosis. Visit our website to learn more. The ankle brachial index is one of our “25” diagnostic techniques that we teach.”

There are no ASMR-related comments and quite frequently this means it isn’t a desperately great video.

It starts with the standard Stanford musical intro (boo hiss). The medical professional is John Cooke MD and John has an excellent voice. There is a slight background hiss which is unfortunate, but nothing as bad as some of the air conditioning we have heard.

There is a doppler device in use which some people might find off-putting. The noises from this device seem to get louder and more explosive as the video goes on. There is also the standard Stanford end music as well.

We have visited the Stanford Medicine 25 channel prior to this and we know that the videos tend to be divided into playlists.

This video comes from the playlist Stanford Medicine 25: Ankle Brachial Index. There is only one other video in this playlist, and it is this one:

Ankle Brachial Index (ABI) Test: How to Perform

The notes do not introduce anything substantially new. This one is also presented by John; this time the video is seven- and three-quarter minutes long. There are comments and this time, the odd one might be ASMR-related (the comments as usual are variable). John continues to have a great voice in this video. But we know what is coming when the doppler device is produced again.

The doppler device does produce the odd distracting noise. This is a shame because I do like John’s voice and the pacing of the presentation. It is only because of this that I am considering running with these two in the playlist to begin with. Sadly it is quite likely that both will ultimately get culled for the archive list.

The Stanford Medicine Playlist on the Procrastination Pen is here:

The overall playlist of videos covered so far on the Procrastination Pen is here:

The videos weeded out because over time they are just not as good as the others is in this archive list:

I keep this in case subscribers to the Procrastination Pen have personal favourites that they want to hear.

The playlist of videos requiring age verification is here:

I can’t be bothered to stop my listening to log on, this interrupts the experience. You may not mind this in which case this list is for you.

I hope that you find the playlists restful and I hope you get plenty of sleep.

If you liked this blog article, why not follow this blog.

Until next time.

Picture DeepAI.org

Sleeping With ASMR

For those who have stuck with this blog, well done and thank-you. You will be aware of the format that this blog has followed for over a year now and I thought that just for a treat we would have a change. Instead of focusing on inadvertent ASMR videos from YouTube as, by-and-large, I have done for a long time now, what if in between I take a look at a video from a professional ASMR artist and consider whether it is worthwhile.

The drive remains a mechanism for getting some sleep. The difference is that someone is deliberately setting out to be relaxing, so we should be disposed to have extremely high expectations.

Searching YouTube for ASMR material yields up a bewildering array of videos and quite a lot of them look unsuitable before I even give them a review.

However, this one:

ASMR Medical ROLE PLAY | Cranial Nerve Exam (personal attention for relaxation and sleep)

is by an artist who has been around for some time and who has her own entry in the online ASMR index.

This is one of many by Isabel on a medical theme and given this is just a diversion I am not going to explore the others here. This is just a taster.

Not unexpectedly, Isabel has a truckload of followers and enough videos to restock Netflix on a Friday evening.

This particular video is a little over thirty eight minutes in length and for me it’s a little on the breathy side. (But I imagine some ASMR fans rather like that).

There are also some jarring beeps at intervals which would not dispose me towards snooziness, I must confess.

I’m also not a fan of the scratchy noises. However, I imagine for some people they are the main appeal.

It has notes but given a lot of professional artists focus on the merchandising, I won’t repeat them here.

Comments are permitted and, boy, are there a lot of those. A quick review though indicates that they are predominantly positive which is unusual in comparison to the video comments we have become used to.

I’m always a little concerned by professional ASMR videos in that predominantly the artists featured are, shall we say, a little too attractive to be considered average. In such cases I am suspicious that fans are attending not because of the quality of the sound…

The sound quality (as we would expect) is sublime with no weird background noises, no loud equipment noises and it just shows the incredibly high bar that an inadvertent ASMR video is aiming for (and habitually misses).

In any case, as this is a diversion, I am currently not disposed to set up an Isabel playlist on the Procrastination Pen (unless there is call for such a thing).

I will instead add such videos to the Sweetie Jar playlist on the assumption that a subset of readers might use such material to fall asleep to (as opposed to the inadvertent ASMR videos which have been the focus of this blog to date).

So returning to the main theme.

Today we go back to a channel which has been an old favourite which is the University of Leicester

Regular readers will know that we have been here before and whilst the videos on this channel may not be quite the ASMR standard of Isabel it has consistently delivered some restful videos.

The video featured today is this one:

Respiratory Examination – Demonstration

Again it is a professional video and so as we expect it has some notes:

“257,959 views 14 Dec 2011

A second more detailed video can be found at; http://www2.le.ac.uk/departments/msce…

This is a real-time demonstration illustrating technique and patient interaction involved in the Respiratory Examination.

The film was produced by practising clinicians to aid the teaching of clinical examination skills. It starts at the point when the clinician has finished taking the medical history and begins the clinical examination.

Presented by Dr Jonathan Bennett MD FRCP Consultant Respiratory Physician. Produced and Directed by Dr Irene Peat FRCR FRCP, Dr Nicholas Port MBChB BSc and Jon Shears.

More Clinical Examination materials can be found at; http://www2.le.ac.uk/departments/msce…”

This leads us to suspect that there are more videos out there on a similar theme and so it is worth taking a while to try and identify them.

This one is a little over six minutes and so it barely has time to take a run up before it is all over.

There are comments and as usual a number of the comments are as helpful as a leg iron.

This though may help us identify the others in this series:

“@UniversityLeicester

12 years ago

There is a second video in which the Doctor does explain the procedure. All the videos in this series can be found in the Clinical Examinations Playlist on the University of Leicester Channel.”

The video starts without music, how delightful, but it does have the constant background accompaniment of air conditioning, sadly. The pace and tone are both ideal, there is an absence of offensive noises and even some light humour. What is not to like.

The “patient” is Mr Jackson, the medical professional is introduced only in the notes Dr Jonathan Bennett MD FRCP Consultant Respiratory Physician.

This is a great Procrastination Pen playlist candidate.

The Clinical Examinations playlist mentioned in those comments appears to be this one:

Looking at that playlist, there would appear to be only one other video which features the same “patient” and the same medical professional, and it would be this one:

Respiratory Examination – Explanation

This one is hardly enormous as it is only just over ten minutes in length.

There are, as expected, notes “482,017 views 28 May 2012

This is a detailed explanation of the Respiratory Examination illustrating technique and patient interaction. The film was produced by practising clinicians to aid the teaching of clinical examination skills. It starts at the point when the clinician has finished taking the medical history and begins the clinical examination. Presented by Dr Jonathan Bennett MD FRCP Consultant Respiratory Physician. Produced and Directed by Dr Irene Peat FRCR FRCP, Dr Nicholas Port MBChB BSc and Jon Shears. More Clinical Examination materials can be found at; http://www2.le.ac.uk/departments/msce…”

There is no music to start and, again, the presentation is calm and quiet. I also love how polite everyone is in this video.

Some of the explanations are a little on the off-putting side. (I’m not sure that discussions of sputum pots are that restful).

By and large though, this one is as delightful as the last one.

The University of Leicester Playlist on the Procrastination Pen is here:

The overall playlist of videos covered so far on the Procrastination Pen is here:

The videos weeded out because over time they are just not as good as the others is in this archive list:

I keep this in case subscribers to the Procrastination Pen have personal favourites that they want to hear.

The playlist of videos requiring age verification is here:

I can’t be bothered to stop my listening to log on, this interrupts the experience. You may not mind this in which case this list is for you.

I hope that you find the playlists restful and I hope you get plenty of sleep.

If you liked this blog article why not follow this blog.

Until next time.

Photo by Akshat Vats on Unsplash

Wreck of the Week

Another rusting relic this week for the corrosion fans to enjoy.

The idea came after reading the property website:
http://www.wreckoftheweek.co.uk/

I thought that something should exist for cars, buses, vans, lorries and motorcycles.

When I look into it the nation’s favourite auction site is casting up many dozen examples of rusting relics. Many that require extreme bravery and much metalworking skill.

This week’s wreck is a piece of German manufacturing history:
https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Mercedes-Fintail-220-LHD-Restoration-Project-or-Spares/323003442386

It is located apparently in Arboleas, Spain

One of the advantages of Spain (from a metal perspective) of course is that it is beautifully dry.

That is not to say that signs of the corrosion beetle are absent. The sills on this example look worthy of some close attention.

Although listed as suitable for spares I am not certain what spares you will be able to glean.

For a start there are no doors and the car interior is more like a shed. The seats are squeezed into it and look torn and stained.

Fortunately front and rear glass is in place.

Confusingly the listing states the registration date is 08/10/1964. But in the same description also maintains that it is a 1967 Mercedes 220.

I’m not certain how those two things can coexist.

The 220 reputation is for being bullet proof. Indeed the body on this seems to have survived moderately well.

But a lot of parts are missing – this picture has no sign of an engine for example.

It looks like this car was a donor in the past. One of those magnificent stacked headlights is missing. As is the proud chrome grill.

A quick scan of the Internet reveals that the 220 is well served with parts however https://www.niemoeller.de/en/mercedes-benz-oldtimer-spare-parts/spare-parts-catalog-mercedes-benz-170-220.

I’m taken by the location which looks like a cross between a wasteland and a prison yard in these photographs.

The price seems low at £500 (currently with no bids). But a better prospect is https://www.classiccarsforsale.co.uk/mercedes-benz/220/223226 at €4,850. (Although it lacks the stacked headlights I notice.

This one looks even better https://www.classic-trader.com/uk/cars/listing/mercedes-benz/fintail/200/1967/117659 at £22,098.

So it does look like these 200s fetch a reasonable sum.

However at the end of any restoration you would still have a left hand drive car.

It does look as if Right Hand Drive versions are not rare https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Mercedes-220-SEB-W111-FINTAIL-STACKED-HEADLIGHT-MODEL-1963-/222789612102?_trksid=p2141725.m3641.l6368.

Sadly the chances of rescue for this old girl are not looking high. At least not in the UK (There are no bids at the time of writing).

Although it would be marvellous to be proved wrong. And to see the before and after photographs.

Fifty Special Things – Brampton Wood

When: 30-10-2016

Where: Brampton Wood http://www.visiteastofengland.com/Huntingdon-Brampton-Wood/details/?dms=3&venue=0211398

Price: Free

Review: Not at its best in October; go when it’s warmer

Tip: follow the satnav in this case it makes a better job of finding it.

Brampton wood and the start of many wood visits.

Communing with nature is restorative: http://www.yesmagazine.org/planet/we-know-nature-makes-us-happier-now-science-says-it-makes-us-kinder-too-20160312.

So to start with this appeared to be a great choice.

The Wildlife Trusts’ guidebook states that they have managed the wood since 1992. They bought it from the Ministry of Defence.

Guidebook: Bedfordshire Cambridgeshire Northamptonshire guide: “Where to See Wildlife in Bedfordshire, Cambridgeshire & Northamptonshire”.

I was attending the Bolnhurst Steam Fair http://www.bolnhurstrally.org.uk/ when someone came up and sold me membership. This is not an organisation I would have thought of but I am supportive of any group that puts trees before house building.

They have a good little guide to local woods and also a website worthy of a visit: http://www.wildlifebcn.org/.

Brampton Wood has been a site of Special Scientific Interest since 1954.

But it turns out that spotting wildlife is somewhat more difficult than on some of our trips abroad.

The wood is home to dormice (which were re-introduced in 1992) but so far all we seem to have seen in our woodland visits are species of canine on and off leads.

It is the second largest woodland in Cambridgeshire at 132 hectares (327 acres). The largest is Bedford Purlieus: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bedford_Purlieus_NNR. (Which might be the subject of a future visit/blog item).

The Wildlife Trusts organisation have a good leaflet on Brampton Wood: http://data.wildlifetrusts.org/sites/default/files/Brampton%20Wood%20Leaflet%202015.pdf.

But the wood majored less on the picturesque and more on the damp and cold the day that I went.

The guidebook states there are more than two miles of wide mown pathways and some minor pathways and follows: “pathways maybe muddy” – read will be very muddy. Take wellies (and a small tractor to drag you out).

Brampton wood appears easy to find. But where it appeared to be on the map was not where the satnav wished us to go. We went with our own judgement, and got lost. (OS Ref is TL 184 698).

If you want to find it Google indicates that it is here:

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/place/Brampton+Wood+Nature+Reserve/@52.3166644,-0.2744105,17z/data=!3m1!4b1!4m5!3m4!1s0x4877c3cb62522f8f:0x491c3106c976241c!8m2!3d52.3166644!4d-0.2722218.

Directions are: From A1, take A14 exit towards Huntingdon. Take the first exit off A14 to Brampton (B1514). Go straight at the first roundabout then right at the second roundabout. Turn right at the T-junction on to Grafham Road. Follow Grafham Road through the village and over the A1. The reserve is on the north side of the road – 1/2 mile out of Brampton. A brown sign indicates the entrance to the wood. Park in the small car park. (When they say small they are not kidding).

Following the satnav lead to a tiny left-hander off the A1. This looked to need the sort of deceleration which the Beagle Lander attempted on Mars.

As a result we took the circuitous route. This required navigation of a narrow road with enough oncoming traffic to provide diversion. After many wood-related trips we found this was typical.

Being a virgin of wood visits I anticipated a car park devoid of vehicles, our journey punctuated by some kindly gamekeeper (with a discussion of pheasant breeding practices or some such).

But turning into the most bijou of car parks I found it already well inhabited with vehicles which could have labelled modern, shiny, and family.

We squeezed in at the end of a row of these.

Vehicles distinguished by large rear load areas. Every one of those vehicles contained inhabitants which you could call “Rover”.(Second piece of education of the day).

All varieties of fur – caked in material which was going to need more than a small towel to remonstrate with.

Each one of the human car inhabitants turned out to have a species of cheeriness, this associated with bobble-hat, fleece, and large rangy hound.

We had snaffled the last space (or so we thought). Yet another shiny Tonka-toy-thing burbled in behind. The driver did not resort to shouting or fist-waving so I assume found somewhere to slot it.

The ground was that species of compliant which one will be familiar with if embarking-out barefoot on a wet evening and murdering a large slug in darkness with one’s toes as the offensive weapon.

Phil’s recommendation: go when it’s warmer. Although given how popular woods turn out to be with dog walkers you are always going to have a lot of company.

It is a top site for bluebells in the spring so that may well be worth a try. I wouldn’t bother with October. Unless you have a 4×4 and something large with waggy tail which doesn’t smell great when it’s wet.

Fortunately the ground was well furnished with leaves. Rainfall sufficiently far in the past that waders were not a necessity.

The Wildlife Trusts’ booklet informs me that the wood is at least 900 years old. And so had a mention in the Domesday Book.

I’m sure in the summer it is a goodly place. But the day we went it had the kind of sombre air usually reserved for death and religious buildings. (Or some combination of those).

The link above http://www.wildlifebcn.org turns out to be the Bedfordshire, Cambridgeshire and Northamptonshire Wildlife trust – check out their website for further details.

We decided to do a circuit (starting at the noticeboards).

The link above http://www.hffs.org.uk is for the Huntingdonshire Fauna and Flora Society – check out their website for further details

And so embarked on a journey around what one imagined to be the circumference – just inside the tree line.

Diverting at intervals to have privacy from the next bobble-hatted group.

In places there were stands of conifers – planted when the Government managed the wood.

These are being removed for the wood to re-establish.

The circuit seemed too brief to me and convinced me that we must have taken the wrong route.

I’d only said good morning to 1/2 dozen people or so and I estimated the population at that time to be several times that. So where had they all gone?

After reviewing the map of the wood we realised that we had only circuited part of it. So there was a lot left to see on future visits.

A little of a good thing convinced me that more of this experience would prove more fulfilling. So decided that this wildlife idea was for me.

Gazing between the trees gave me brief memories of Borneo. It was with sadness I realised that we would see no macaque this trip. (Nor catch our clothes on any rattan).

Back to the car. The surrounding shiny and four wheel drive had swapped about a bit but not reduced in number. So lesson of wood exploration wood=popular=pooches began to form in my mind.

Stately homes seem to be the places where frazzled adults take their small person. Woods however are where red cheeked outdoors people range about with carnivores.

Well there’s a learning point.

Brampton as we found out later was remarkable in its tidiness (i.e. no dog faeces).

Despite the car park it also proved to be unrepresentative in its lack of population. Subsequent woods were to prove much more popular.

Grafham Fireworks – Grafham Village – 2016

An Unofficial Review

Summary:

When: 05-11-2016
Where: Grafham Village Hall http://www.grafham.org.uk/villagehallhire
Price: £4 per adult, £2 children (free parking) – sparklers £1 for 5
Tip: take something to light sparklers with.

Amazing the number of places who believe that the gunpowder plot was on November 4th. Maybe my memory isn’t so hot but I thought it went “remember remember the 5th of November.”

I had high hopes of attending Kimbolton this year but it turns out the Catholic attempts at shrugging off Protestant repression occurred a whole day earlier than I thought.

Sadly coincidentally with my seeing a couple of counselling clients. (Who (I imagined) might think it a bit rich if I sloped off to catch a few fireworks).

Anyway so it was the 5th and fight my way into Cambridge (and choose between parking in a dinky car sized space or paying an Ivana Trump style fee for leaving my wheels somewhere).

Alternatively something a bit more local and risk fireworks – the impressiveness of which probably wouldn’t disturb the wildlife much.

And so I saw an advert for fireworks at Grafham (piggin’ close), ample on street parking (free) and £4 entry.

This appealed to every cheapskate aspect of my personality.

Of course it is dark around 11am now and this is profoundly disturbing to a large number of motorists I have discovered.

Therefore I was pleasantly surprised when turning off at Great Staughton that we managed a steady 50mph all the way to the Grafham village turn.

The event is surprisingly well subscribed and we joined a convoy on the access road which culminated in the inevitable car park when we reached the village.

However there was a left turn which had something to do with the church – I figured we had legs. The decision turned out to be a good one as we parked just inside the village limits and were followed by lots of other motorists looking for some gridlock respite.

The walk to the village hall had a frisson of excitement as I had no idea where it was. There was general milling around of tired taller people with excitable smaller ones.

Eventually tagging along with a reasonable sized group of smaller people (at a distance I judged appropriate to avoid Rolf Harris accusations) led us out into a well-lit area. Where people were extracting us from our silver and permitting us access in one motion.

It turned out that smaller persons were only £2 so something of a bargain if you have smaller persons that you intend to take.

The field was already looking like the early stages of a concert venue and one person was doing a swift trade in packets of sparklers – something I cannot remember playing with since I was myself a smaller person.

These were the ruinous amount of £1 for a packet of 5 (so we got two packets).
I hadn’t thought to bring lighting devices so sidled over to a man who seemed capable of turning multiple sausages at once on a barbecue that the US airforce would have envied.

We got the first sparkler lit but then instead of enjoying it I spent the remaining time anxiously lighting one after the other from it to ensure we had a means of lighting them.

Phil’s top tip take a cigarette lighter…

By this stage a healthy queue had developed and given the English love of queues I had to participate.

We were queuing beside the QE2 sized barbecue and heading into a village hall so I had strong hopes of tea.

The queue became porous as greater and greater numbers of people poured in and wanted intimate contact with the bonfire. Only accessible apparently by pushing past those queueing.

The night was perishing windy and I was grateful for the surrounding houses which kept the autumnal blast down to merely finger biting proportions.

After an interval – in which some members of the queue had evolved into other life forms – we got inside the door and saw the queue split in different directions.

No tea.

There was a sign saying mulled wine – tempting but no mulled wine was off. Later someone went in for mulled wine from the bonfire and I reflected that they really needed to up the volumes – a lot.

There was hotdog, there was soup, there were baked potatoes.

Hmm decisions decisions big stomach ache or really big stomach ache. (I have IBS so I’m not supposed to eat wheat or potatoes).

So we opted for hotdog, which on a cold autumn night was frankly delicious in fact I had two of them.

£1 each – another Grafham bargain. Volunteers were friendly and in frank amazement at the level of demand – food shifting at a rate of knots. I reassured them by telling them about the car parking demands and likely consequence for their ability to get out at the end. (I’m noted for my helpfulness).

We emerged at the self-same moment the fireworks began with an enormous clap that should have accompanied the London New Year’s celebrations (and not a small fireworks display in a local village).

It was so exciting that out came the iPhone:

After far too many pictures and fingers turning the shade of whitewash I had to put gloves on again – never thought iPhone gloves would be of any use till this.
It was spectacular so many bangs you could have made a convincing run at the 1812 overture. So many wees and squeals that a room full of piglets with a megaphone would not have outdone it.

Every time that I thought it was at an end another ffft-pow and a great hailstorm of light followed.

Truly the best £4 I’ve spent of late.

And then the silence of the expiry of a few thousand pounds of fireworks.
Followed by much whooping and cheering from the taller persons assembled.
(Smaller persons engaged with various highly-lit toys including some very impressive light-changing light sabres which I really wanted).

So the crowds headed for the exit like some AC/DC concert exodus.

Reason dictated that the tiny village exit road was now swamped with 4x4s and people carriers so we snuck over close to the dying fire.

Just enough heat to warm the face not quite enough for toasty to properly set in.

After a wait that just saw the worst of the crowds dissipate we headed out.
Every road was a trail of red tail lights – it appeared I was going to get to know the best of Radio 4’s evening entertainment.

However the choice of church lane turned out to have been an inadvertent masterstroke.

Somehow we had parked in an area that had quickly cleared of cars.

A quick turn into the village and it was out on the road we came in on. Not only that but 45mph was a reality – despite the obvious darkness. (There is no understanding the brazen guts of people is there).

So home in minutes – feet up with a glass of something – can’t say fairer than that. A top endorsement from me; if you’re in the area next November…

https://www.facebook.com/GrafhamVillageFireworks

Things You Really Will be Doing Now You’re 50 – Part Four

Following on from part three of the things you are going to find when you’re 50.

https://magic-phil.co.uk/2016/12/11/things-you-really-will-be-doing-now-youre-50-part-three

Ten more items from the same list:

Visiting a stately home seems a great idea. You’re persuaded that joining the National Trust/English Heritage will be fun. You find yourself visiting more and more stately homes. After a while you realise these places have only two kinds of visitors: harassed looking young adults with little ones or those moving at the speed of continents. You notice that you do not have any small people with you…
It seems to you that you are on top of this technology business; you worked out how to use Facebook. WhatsApp turned out to be not so difficult. You are concerned though that you keep finding new technology that you’ve never heard of. The speed with which you’re supposed to learn new things seems laughable.
It is cold; it always seems cold. You want warm, you want fashionable you choose Thinsulate…
You’ve sailed through 5 decades with the odd nose bleed and a scraped elbow. Now every minor snuffle lays you low for weeks on end. You start considering flu jabs as a great health investment.
Embracing new things has always been you; every new thing; especially TV programmes. Surprising then how often you find yourself watching David Attenborough, Columbo or Murder She Wrote.
Food is a source of experimentation for you. You’ve tried them all; from sushi to witchetty grubs. Nothing is too wild for you. Recently though intestinal complaints have been so violent you require compensatory plumbing. Oatmeal seems a really tasty idea suddenly.
There’s no way that age can be a barrier to music appreciation. After some diligent listening to chart music you determine that one or two tracks are actually quite enjoyable. When you tell people about this they think it is hysterical.
There is someone gorgeous on the street. A part of your mind reminds you that they could be your child or worse still your grandchild.
Since the age of 18 you’ve been the same weight. Clothes fitted nicely. You could eat what you liked. You felt comfortable in your body. Now you notice the belt is tighter. The scales reveal a depressing story. The weight hangs around your waistline like an accusatory life-preserver.
When you were younger you scoffed at all the silver hair; swearing you would dye it before it got to that stage. Now you realise there is a race between it falling out and changing colour. You become grateful for any hair whatever its colour.

If you missed part one you will find it here:
https://magic-phil.co.uk/2016/12/11/things-you-really-will-be-doing-now-youre-50
If you missed part two you will find it here:
https://magic-phil.co.uk/2016/12/11/things-you-really-will-be-doing-now-youre-50-part-two
If you missed part three you will find it here:
https://magic-phil.co.uk/2016/12/11/things-you-really-will-be-doing-now-youre-50-part-three

Watch out for part five here:
https://magic-phil.co.uk/2016/12/30/things-you-really-will-be-doing-now-youre-50-part-five